Learning To Sit With Discomfort

I posted the following quote by Michael Singer a little while back, “When a problem is disturbing you, don’t ask, “What should I do about it?” Ask, “What part of me is being disturbed by this”. As I re-read it, I thought – yes!! Lately I’ve been sitting in a place where I know I need to pause and listen and instead I’ve become an over-achiever in doing shit. This is a major clue for me to SLOW THE FUCK DOWN and listen to the physical tension in my body and that my thoughts are keeping me awake at night.

If you’re a thinker or a doer like me, then it can be very challenging to pause and take 10 minutes to reflect on the larger pieces at play with the issue at hand. There’s something so appeasing to my doing and thinking parts about Getting. Shit. Done. The culture we live in has hard-wired us to problem solve (do) instead of listen (be with).

As an entrepreneur, there are so many opportunities to create, problem-solve, tweak a little bit more, fail, succeed, and learn a shit-ton along the way.

There are also plenty of ways to avoid and numb ourselves when discomfort arises. What would it be like to notice that pattern of avoidance or numbing and leaning into why we are doing this?

Sitting With Discomfort

Today’s post is short and sweet – if you’ve found yourself on the hamster wheel of life with different problems in your work or personal life: Pause. Take 5 minutes and ask the question, “What part of me is being disturbed by the reality of this problem or solution?

The more challenging part will be creating safety within yourself to sit with any discomfort that arises during this exercise. Often as we start to sink into the emotions, we will somehow find an urgent thing that has to be done this second. We find many creative ways to not stay present with the discomfort of the emotions that arise.

It can be helpful to journal, say it out loud and yes – talk to a therapist if you get stuck in this process.

Shift From the Micro to the Macro-lens on your Life

Today I’m inviting you to explore your larger beliefs and fears at play in one situation in your life. Often when we’re able to connect to these beliefs and rewrite them in our lives, the problem doesn’t look the same anymore.

After you learn to sit with groundedness, safety and support with this part that feels disturbed, you will gain insight and clarity, and perhaps release some old emotions.

So many times, I’ve worked with clients after they’ve done this work and they comment, “That situation would’ve been so challenging for me in the past, but it doesn’t even bother me anymore”. It’s can feel a little eerie and also so freeing.

Where do you need to shift to a wider perspective in your life? Where have you made changes in your life that have shocked you with how different your perspective is now?