• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Juanita Lepage MSW, RSW, BHP

Counselling & Energy Healing (289) 812-8089 Hamilton, Ontario

  • Counselling and Psychotherapy
  • Energy Healing
  • Fees
  • About Me
  • Contact
  • Blog

desmond cole

Anti-Racist Reads For Collective Healing

February 9, 2023 by Juanita Lepage Leave a Comment

three book covers

It’s Black History month and I thought I’d share some books that have come across my path over the last year. Some are more analytical and some are very heart-felt. As we all put energy into healing this collective wound, this impacts all of our physical, mental, and spiritual health in a profound and positive way.

When it comes to being more anti-racist, I find it’s easy to get overwhelmed when I reflect on how far I still need to go. At the same time, I have some compassion for myself, as becoming anti-racist doesn’t happen in the course of a month.

As Resmaa Menakem writes,

“Consider Malcolm Gladwell’s observation that it takes about 10,000 hours of practice to become highly proficient in almost any serious endeavor. By the time African Americans reach adulthood, many have spent 10,000 or more hours learning how to navigate the dangers, constrictions, and contradictions of white-body supremacy. They have done this not by choice, but as a matter of survival. In comparison, most white Americans have spent zero time in such endeavors, for the obvious reason that they haven’t needed to navigate white-body supremacy, but have received support and assistance from it. White people who want to grow out of white-body supremacy now need to put in a similar amount of time and effort in order to change themselves and create new culture.” (p. 267, Manekem – My Grandmother’s Hands)

Committing to 10,000 hours of anti-racist work isn’t the goal (although can you imagine if we all did that?), it’s more the idea that it’s important to start or keep learning, growing, and making changes in parallel with the rest of our life. 1 hour is better than 0 hours. If you were to do one thing this month, what might you do?

Books

Three books that I’ve picked up in 2022 and continue to read and refer to this year include:

  • Me and White Supremacy – Layla F. Saad
  • My Grandmother’s Hands – Resmaa Menakem
  • It was Dark There all the Time – Sophia Burthen and the legacy of slavery in Canada – Andrew Hunter

Me And White Supremacy

If you are a person who holds white privilege and love the idea of journalling and reflecting, this might be the book for you. She gives readers four weeks worth of daily reflections. Even better, she has a guided journal where you can go through the 28 day reflection process.

Local Perspectives

It Was Dark There All The Time

Andrew Hunter is a white Hamiltonian who has written specifically about local connections to slavery. If you’re from Ontario, I’d recommend this read. Otherwise, I’d encourage finding something local about your own geographic area.

The Skin We’re In

This book is a few years older, yet if you’re looking for something more current than looking at our past history, I’d recommend Desmond Cole’s The Skin We’re In. Desmond Cole is a black journalist, activist and author based in Toronto, Canada. Canadians can get a bit smug about living in Canada and thinking we’re less racist than our American counter-parts. Desmond shares his reality and the reality of many other black Canadians. On my list is to also watch his documentary about the creation of this book on CBC Gem.

My Grandmother’s Hands

Menakem’s book is both for BIPOC and white individuals. This book is exceptional. It has heart and soul. Resmaa brings guidance about going beyond understanding racism and healing through reflections and also connecting to our bodies. He delves into the evolution of racism and encourages white individuals to reflect on their own trauma as bridge towards healing. He describes how the trauma of racism is collective for all people. He gives a lot of exercises to try out that can help release past trauma and also reflective questions for all readers. He’s also involved in a variety of online courses with Education for Racial Equity.

If you want a recommendation for one book to read, I’d choose My Grandmother’s Hands. As always, if you have any books that you’ve loved about anti-racism, please share!

Filed Under: Energy Healing Articles, Psychotherapy and Counselling Articles Tagged With: Andrew Hunter, anti-racism, collective healing, desmond cole, layla saad, Resmaa Menakem

Racism, Fierce Women And Pleasure: 2020 Summertime Reads

August 10, 2020 by Juanita Lepage Leave a Comment

So, Racism. Let’s start there because it’s the most important in today’s blog. The world paid attention after the death of George Floyd, and so did I. As a white woman I’ve been spending some time reading, connecting to others, reflecting on what I need to change and starting to make some changes. This large cultural change that needs to happen starts with each of us making a change and it feels very much like a marathon goal and not a sprint.

I’ve included a few books that I’ve read in regards to racism and one of my goals has been to continue this process, so as I continue to find ones I like, I’ll recommend them in my blog on occasion.

As I’ve started to explore my own racism and support of systemic racism more deeply, it has felt heavy and overwhelming at times. I’m a person who can go deeply into heavy topics, but I need to balance it with doing things that bring me joy, pleasure, and peace. It can feel wrong to do these things when so many horrible things are happening around us, but it is very important. For me if I spend time in joy, pleasure, & peace, this allows me to continue exploring this topic of racism and spending energy on making changes. So I’ve included 2 other books today, and while neither of these books are what I would call beach reads, I wanted to include them. But please read those beach reads! I’ve been reading them too, they just didn’t make the list today.

Today’s Books

  1. Born a Crime by Trevor Noah
  2. The Skin We’re In by Desmond Cole
  3. White Fragility by Robin Diangelo
  4. Untamed by Glennon Doyle
  5. Find Your Pleasure by Cynthia Loyst

Born a Crime by Trevor Noah

Born a Crime by Trevor Noah

This was my favourite read. This book is a gift for us all in that Trevor is able to talk about his experiences with racism and oppression in South Africa with candor and humour. He talks about the complexities of racism within the black community and the racist and sexist systems built by white South Africans. Racism is not hidden in South Africa. In Canada, we like to spend time looking at other countries racism and ignoring our own. This book helped me reflect on what lies beneath the surface of our systems here in Canada. I had mixtures of laughter and tears while reading this book. You will end this book loving his mother and in awe of Trevor Noah.

The Skin We’re In by Desmond Cole

The Skin We're In: A Year of Black Resistance and Power: Cole, Desmond:  9780385686341: Books - Amazon.ca

If you’re a white Canadian (and especially Ontarian), if you read any book about racism, I’d recommend this one. Desmond is a black activist and writer based in Toronto, Ontario. He names how the the Canadian media consistently omits the racism happening in our own cities and country and focuses on what is happening in the USA. He details a month by month account of 2017 and racism and systemic racism he challenges in the school board, with the police, in major newspapers and provincial & federal agencies.

As a white woman I realize that I’ve had the privilege of choosing not to read the news when I don’t want to and also the privilege of feeling safe with the police and other agencies. This book was such a gift in that it wasn’t some random facebook article and you’d never find it in the big media outlets because of who owns the big Canadian Newspapers and Media. Read it! And then reflect on which systems in your life you need to hold accountable for change.

White Fragility by Robin Diangelo

White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism:  DiAngelo, Robin, Dyson, Michael Eric ...

This is THE book that I’ve seen as recommended reading on anti-racism. Full disclosure, I haven’t read it all. It’s very helpful, but it’s written by an academic and you can tell. She has lots of videos online. I recommend this Youtube video as a start and then take this book chapter by chapter as she explains what white fragility is and how it shows up in our lives. My understanding is that white fragility shows up as a feeling of defensiveness that white people have when black people name that white people are acting racist. There are feelings of denial and shame. Robin shares how most white people aren’t racist in the conventional sense of hating black people, but that white people are complicit in keeping systemic racism in place by our silence about oppressive behaviours.

Robin asks us to notice our reaction when white or black people get angry in a large group. How do we perceive when men or women get angry in a group? Who’s the loudest? Who’s silent? Who ultimately gets heard?

I read a great facebook post that was shared through the myriad of threads that encouraged us all to reflect on the many forms of fragility in our lives – male fragility that arises with the request for equal pay among genders and the #MeToo movement, or the extensive heterosexual fragility when homosexuals were asking for the right to marry too and not be persecuted for their sexuality. The list goes on and on. What kind of fragility do you have in your life?

Untamed by Glennon Doyle

Untamed by Glennon Doyle

This book is raw, honest, heart-open writing. A friend had listened to the audiobook and recommended it to me (Thank you!). Glennon describes her pattern of writing books and then realizing afterwards that she no longer has the same reflections about her life. It seems that after this book (and me now following her now on Instagram) things have shifted for the better for her. She was/is? a Christian woman who was committed to her faith and her husband. She then worked through a period of his infidelity and after committing to stay, she met Abby Wombach (famous soccer player) at a Book Event and realized that she was attracted to her. She writes about this experience and ultimately her decision to divorce her husband and marry Abby.

She also talks about the realization that if she listens to herself, she is always guided about what to do that meets both her and society’s higher needs. This is what psychotherapy often does too. Our society has been built on telling people they need to go outside themselves to find the answers to their questions. This starts in parenting and our school systems and culture. What if you really could trust your own instincts? Or as Glennon infers, “What if you are really a wild cheetah but you’ve just been tamed? What if you started the practice of untaming yourself?” The focus of the book is on women, but it could be applied to any gender. She is also ahead of the curve of most white people (including me) in regards to racism and reflects on her own journey.

Find Your Pleasure by Cynthia Loyst

Find Your Pleasure | Book by Cynthia Loyst | Official Publisher Page |  Simon & Schuster Canada

I happened up on this book at my local library and was introduced to Cynthia Loyst, who created a beautiful coffee-table book about simple ways to mindfully choose pleasure in your life. This book isn’t a must read, but a gentle reminder and inspiration to nourish ourselves and experience joy. When we do this we create greater space for growth within ourselves and compassion for others.

Phew! That’s a lot of books. I hope that I offered you a little inspiration as you either start or continue your conversations about racism with friends and family, and to also give yourself permission to have some pleasure & nourishment too along the way and within the greater context of the pandemic and all the extra stresses that it brings too.

Filed Under: Psychotherapy and Counselling Articles Tagged With: authenticity, Cynthia Loyst, desmond cole, glennon doyle, Pleasure, racism, robin diangelo, trevor noah

Primary Sidebar

Blog Topics

  • Energy Healing Articles
  • Life Skills
  • Parenting Articles
  • Psychotherapy and Counselling Articles
  • Spirituality

Search Here…

Footer

Follow Me

Ontario College of Social Workers and Social Service Workers
barbara brennan school of healing logo

Juanita Lepage - Counselling & Energy Healing

2SLGBTQ+ friendly space

430 York Blvd
Hamilton, ON L8R 3K8

(289) 812-8089

My Privacy Policy    Terms & Conditions

© 2023 Juanita Lepage